#74: Marching band rant (part 2)

For marching band we are doing a “Painted Life” theme.  Don’t ask me what the heck that means. All I know is that it was based off of a poem one of the guard people wrote for their English class and it talks about how each color of life represents something different. As far as I know, no one wanted to do the painted life show except for the band director and the guard director, who apparently don’t care about what the band wants, but only what they want to do for the band. We started playing the music on the first day of marching band. It is difficult and it sounds pretty, but personally I do not think it is marching band style music. Marching bands are supposed to keep the crowd excited. With this music we will either put them to sleep, or they will lose interest very quickly. I’m not saying that the music is bad. Our composer did a good job writing it, but its not for marching band. Or at least, not our marching band. The music is really short so far too, we needat least an 8 minute show (I think) to be in competition, but so far each of the three pieces we have gotten has only been a minute long…and we only have one more piece coming…

#73: Marching band rant + summer

My band director wants me to play piccolo for the upcoming marching season, so I have to find piccolo lessons to fit into my hectic summer schedule. I am going to Boston for a week in June, and then I am going to the beach for a week, then I am going on a mission trip with my school to Florida for a week, but my family and I are staying down there for an extra week and visiting some family friends and possibly going to Universal Studios and Disney World again. Then the last two weeks of my summer are going to be taken up by marching band and I am going to be having bake sales to raise money for my senior trip to Europe which costs like $3,000 to go, but I want to go! Between all that stuff I am gonna have to find time to work and now time to learn piccolo. We already have one piccolo in marching band, and it is hard enough to get that one in tune. I can’t imagine how we are going to manage 2 piccolos. Maybe it will work if we are on opposite sides of the field…yeah that might work.

#72: Marching band: Day 1 (part 2)

Sharing our testimonies might not be  a thing to do for the summer camp since we are tight on time, but maybe at the girls sleepover or just at a function outside of marching band (if we ever have one). As leadership, we should be able o connect on a spiritual level with everyone as well as a regular level.  Some people might not want to do it, and that is understandable, but for me personally, knowing how much I have been through that most people don’t know about, I think I could reach a lot of people. Maybe that is just me being vain, but I do. I have been thinking about doing something like this for a while but I have always been scared of how people would react. I have talked to my therapist about it and she thinks that it would be a good step for me to take, but I am still going back and forth about it. Last year I was barely there for the marching season, but this year will be my senior year and I will be leaving (and probably not coming back) and I want to leave a legacy or at least touch some people’s hearts because what good would I be if  I couldn’t even do that?

#71: Marching Band: Day 1

The first day of marching band went surprisingly well. I think our composer for the music that we are playing was smoking something when she wrote the music though. 80% of the band are not very experienced players, and even though I have been playing for almost 8 years, I think it is hard. I’m glad that we have a challenge, but the fact that we only have so long and so much time each day to work on this music is a major problem! I mean I like the challenge, I do, but there is a time and place for it and this is neither that time or place. Another thing that happened is that I think I have officially been designated the “bring me your personal problems” person. I don’t necessarily mind. I am happy to help in anyway I can, but sometimes I just need help handling my own problems, let alone other people’s problems. I have been thinking lately (scary right?).  Last year in marching band, each of the leadership gave a devotion everyday for a week, but I was thinking of changing it up a bit. Devotions are good, but I feel like some of us should share our testimonies.

#70: Mermaid tails and my probs (part 2)

The only thing is, I am really self conscious about my body. I mean I don’t even like to wear a bathing suit in front of people, let alone look at my own reflection in the mirror. Its just part of my many issues. I’m sure it might get better in time (but over the past few years it has just been getting worse…). Everybody usually just tells me it’s a phase or that it’s normal or that I’ll get over it, but they just don’t understand. I just gave up trying to explain it to people. That along with the rest of my problems.  I can’t make people understand me, but I can just choose not to tell them. Some people find out about my problems anyway. For some people finding out, I don’t mind, but for others it’s a friendship ender (I’m hinting that me and that person do not and probably will not ever speak or acknowledge each others existence again). I guess that person didn’t really care about me in the first place or else they would have stuck around.

#69: Mermaid tails and my probs

I am so ready for our pool to be open. We are getting it redone on Monday so by Tuesday I am going to be swimming until my whole body is a giant prune. I love being in the water. I’m not some Olympic swimmer, but the water just has a calming effect on me. Just letting my body sink below the surface of the water allows my head to be clear and for me to totally relax and let go.  When I was little I used to dream I was a mermaid, but then I realized that was never going to happen (I’m actually still a little bitter about that actually). Last year, my friends and I decided we were going to get mermaid tails to wear and swim in and then we were gonna go to the beach and swim in them and possibly freak people out. It was gonna be awesome, but then we went to look online and saw the price of them…and then looked at our empty pockets, and then we silently let the dream die…we thought we could make them, but “ain’t nobody got time for that!” I still kinda want one though cuz I mean come on, it would be awesome to swim in a mermaid tail. I mean really!